The Outcasts Read online

  I knew there was no way that Corinth could have known that moment would be the last time he’d see my father, again. And I really wanted to reassure him of that fact, but there was a small part of me that was mad he hadn’t stopped him from taking off, too.

  Chapter 2

  I WAS ANGRY, NOT so much at Corinth for not telling me about that night, but at myself for not stopping him from leaving, either. The thing that had gotten me was how easily my pain could blossom back up to the surface as if it were the day he left all over again. I’d thought I had filled that ‘figurative’ hole. Corinth’s admission had lit a fire underneath me, though. I was going to find my father and give him a piece of my mind because it still didn’t answer the age old question of why? Why did he leave? He had seemed so happy. And then there was still the matter of his journal he’d hidden from prying eyes. Thoughts like these are what kept me up all night. So, when I finally found the perfect balance between the room temperature and the temperature underneath my covers, it was time to get up.

  Being late for school again would put me in a bind, so I peeled myself off my bed and rushed through the process of getting ready. I threw on my favorite pair of jeans, and then put my hair in a ponytail and crept past my mom's room to hear her snoring. She was a nurse who worked nights and I didn't want to disturb her. Sometimes, she left breakfast out. Not today, though, so I grabbed the car keys off the counter and wedged myself into the Toyota. On days like this, I wished even more that Corinth went to my school. He made the teasing a little more bearable.

  Before I knew it, I was squealing into the parking lot, my foot on the clutch then brake, when I found one last spot in the cramped parking lot.

  When the bell finally rang for lunch, my stomach let out a growl. It had its own language and it was telling me to eat. Now. The lunch line was long but it gave me time to look at all the endless possibilities in front of me. Food was my comfort. It was familiarity. It was one tiny second of relief from the constant pressure settled on top of my shoulders. And in that minuscule second of relief, I found ecstasy.

  A voice interrupted my thoughts. “You're not going to eat that are you?” My eyes stayed locked on the food as I said, “You know I'll eat anything that doesn't run from me.”

  Amber snorted, “So, I planned on going to a concert this weekend and I need a friend who enjoys music as much as I do. Know anyone who might be interested?”

  “Um—”

  “—I'll count you in,” she finished for me. Amber was my one and only friend here but we didn't hang out all of the time. Mainly because I was pretty sure she had a huge crush on Corinth--everyone seemed to and he didn't even go to this school.

  The cheeseburger called to me, so I plucked it from the warming station. The low watt bulbs only managed to keep the food slightly above room temperature--but I didn't care. Every time I showed up in the buffet line, Ms. Schrute, the beady eyed queen of hairnets would glare dagger eyes at me until I'd passed. I don't know why she hated me; I single handedly kept this school open just by purchasing lunch.

  “What did you say?” I asked absentmindedly and then I remembered the current topic of conversation. “I have to save every penny for my trip.” I glanced at her out of the corner of my eye. The look of disappointment was almost enough to make me change my mind. Guilt trips worked on me.

  “Ditch your friend before you leave for an entire summer. I understand. Good thing Corinth's coming with,” Amber said.

  I couldn’t help but feel a sudden pang of jealousy hit at thinking about Corinth and Amber at the concert without me. An image of Corinth leaning into her to whisper something in her ear hit me. Nope, nope, nope, not gonna happen.

  Someone walking behind me saw my tray and said, “Oink...oink...oink...” Amber twirled around but they'd already passed as she muttered, “Such assholes.”

  “Speaking of, where were you yesterday after school?” I grumbled.

  She rolled her eyes. “Detention again, sorry.”

  Pulling money out of my pocket, I handed it to Ms. Schrute. She snatched it from my fingers right as Amber gestured to her plate, so I paid for hers, too. The Hairnet Queen gave me my change and an eye roll.

  As we weaved our way through the crowd I asked, “That's all you're going to eat?” All she had was some chocolate chip cookies and cheese crackers. No wonder she was so skinny. She pulled a fry from my plate and munched on it.

  “How'd you convince Corinth to go?” I said, peering at her from over my towering tray of food. We had found the closest table with two chairs next to each other and I now knew why they'd been vacated—usually finding prime real estate like this during lunch rush hour was no easy task. It was the raucous group of choir kids next to us that did it. They were chanting “STATE!” over and over again while pounding their fists on the table. One of my fries toppled from its precarious position on my tray and I eyed it in agony as it hit the floor.

  I glared dagger eyes at them as Amber said, “I should have led with Corinth coming.” She gave me a sheepish grin. “I sorta promised him you'd be there. If I didn't know any better I'd say he has a thing for you.”

  I leaned forward, “What did he say?”

  “You two really need to go out or something,” she muttered.

  “There's no way he likes me like that.”

  She rolled her eyes. “Right.”

  If Corinth went to my school he'd be the most popular guy here. The popular crowd would require him to bulk up, get rid of his Star Wars action figures, change his wardrobe, of course—even though for me, these things were what made him so special. But to his popularity credit, he had dated Madison, (the most popular girl in school) and for a whole month to top it off. A month is a lifetime in high school dating. It also happened to be the worst month of my life.

  It puzzled me how they got together in the first place. He told me she really seemed into movies. Corinth was one of those people who enjoyed the solitude at the theater, so he'd go by himself a lot.

  Apparently, Madison had a dirty little secret, too. According to Corinth, they had ended up sitting next to each other on accident and started up a conversation. Yuck.

  We didn't talk much during the Dark Times-that's what I called it.

  Eventually, Corinth was the one to break it off. I think it was the reason Madison hated me so much. I think she secretly still liked him and couldn't stand the fact that we were besties.

  Amber elbowed me and I yelped in surprise.

  The choir kids next to us burst into fits of laughter at seeing me jump. She put a hand over her mouth and giggled as I glowered back, ignoring all the stares in my direction. I wished I could be more like Amber. She didn't care what anyone else thought about her. Maybe she would be the better match for Corinth.

  As if she could read my mind, she said, “Well if you're not going to date him, maybe I will.”

  I almost choked on the massive amount of fries I was shoveling into my mouth as I gave her my best you-know-we're-not-going-to-discuss-this-again look.

  "I'm in," I said with a full mouth. It wasn't that big of a win for her. I succumbed to peer-pressure way too easily.

  But she smiled anyway, triumphant in her negotiating skills.

  Chapter 3

  THAT NIGHT AFTER SCHOOL I pulled my dad's journal from in between my mattress and box spring and sniffed the paper. The faint scent of his cologne still clung to the thin pages after all these years. The sudden memory of him made my stomach clench. This was the only thing I had left to remind me of him. I tried to imagine his face as I read his words for the umpteenth time:

  June 7th

  I'm back in Bromham. This is my third trip. I think I've taken a picture of every inch of this town, including all of the people in it. In all honesty, this place is really growing on me. Everyone is friendly. The Swan is nice and the bartender chats a lot. Maybe I had too much whiskey, but I'm seriously considering moving my family here.

  There was a crumpled photograph tucked between
the pages of this section the first time I looked through it. My dad kept photos of everything, so it wasn't a surprise that there was one in his journal. It was a picture of an old tree—the trunk was as big as I'd ever seen but it didn't have leaves. That was the eerie thing; the branches snaked upward, like skeletal arms reaching for some unseen object in the sky. There were two words on the back of the photo: Trembling Giant. I didn't think it was significant, my dad liked landscapes, but this particular tree was ethereal. I tucked the worn photo back between the pages, using it as my book-mark, and checked my phone for any new messages. Amber had texted:

  Don't forget about tom night to meet at the concert. I'll see u up there at 9. Tell C to wear that shirt I like so much ;-)

  The next thing I knew, I was lying at an odd angle on the couch and I bolted upright, a cramp shooting its way up through my calf. I wasn’t even sure how I had been that tired in the first place. My neck hurt and my heart was pounding so hard I thought I was having a heart attack. It had been a nightmare that had caused this reaction, but for the life of me, I couldn't remember what it was about.

  The feeling of being watched was so strong I went to the living room and mashed my face against the glass. Soft light from a lamp near the window made it impossible to see out. This was a bad spot to be in if a psycho with an axe was looking in at me at the same time as I was looking out.

  Lucky for me, Jason Voorhees didn't greet me in his usual fashion and the only sign of life was the barking of a dog in a nearby neighbor's yard.

  Even though I didn't see anyone, I couldn't get past that creepy-crawly-critters-on-the-neck feeling.

  ***

  It was only two weeks until I left for England, but this evening I had planned on relishing my time spent with Corinth. When we arrived at the concert hall, people were already showing up in droves. Hiking into the amphitheater I found it no surprise that even my sweat was sweating.

  Corinth noticed my discomfort and in his usual magnificently superfluous fashion managed to combine concern and teasing by the lift of one eyebrow. “You gonna make it?”

  His teasing always left me flustered, especially when he grabbed my shoulders to guide me to the front doors. The Star Wars T-shirt he wore was form fitted, even after he'd layered it over a red long sleeved thermal. Corinth Taylor wasn't a weight lifter by any means, but his biceps and the cut of his shirt still made him appear more muscular than he actually was. It made me want to reach out and touch him.

  Instead, I found a stray strand of hair and pushed it out of my face.

  Amber was at the box office picking up our tickets when we walked up. Once through the gates, we shoved our way past several people. The opening band had already started by the time we found our seats. The bass was loud and my whole body shook with the music. The hike from my car to the parking lot had left me feeling gross and sticky. Deodorant was a life saver. It was what got me through most days. The restroom seemed so far away but I'd better go now and reapply. I yelled at Corinth to let him know where I was going but he gave me a generic head bob right as Amber leaned conspiratorially close to whisper something in his ear.

  This was exactly why we didn't all hang out in the same social circle.

  Why couldn't she see how much her flirting with him bothered me?

  She wasn't doing it on purpose. I didn't even think she was actually interested in him—but some tiny voice in the back of my mind kept telling me otherwise.

  The only thing I could see were the tops of people's heads as I made my way to the bathroom.

  Don't drink anything else tonight, I told myself at the sight of the ginormous line. Crowds were not my thing. This night just kept getting better and better, especially when Madison Bristow and her horde showed up to stand right behind me. I wasn't surprised they were here. This was a popular band. I inched my way into a group of girls in front of me hoping Madison wouldn't notice. Colton—Madison's boyfriend—with blonde hair and unnaturally white teeth—was the epitome of an all-star football player or aspiring Abercrombie and Fitch Model. Good thing they were too engrossed in themselves to notice me.

  But after a few minutes of me burying my head into my phone, someone shoved me on my shoulder. I turned to see who it was and cringed at my misfortune. Stephanie was one of Madison's gang and I was immediately met by her smile—which was as fake as her tan.

  She said, “It's Lardo!” Her beady eyes raked over me as she continued, “Don't tell me you're here all by yourself?”

  Halle joined in with a giggle and said, “Look how red she is.”

  I pride myself on being witty most days but something about the combination of having Madison near me and the fact that Colton was staring blankly at me created a chasm of no retorts.

  After what seemed like an eternity, I found my voice, “You know what's funny?”

  “What's that?” Madison said, twirling her gum around her pinky finger.

  “There isn't a name for a group of bitches—I mean there's a flock of seagulls, a murder of crows, gaggle of geese, but y'all are...oh, wait, I got it, a bunch of bitches.”

  Madison's eyes narrowed as she leaned in close and the overwhelming smell of alcohol on her breath hit me. “You're pathetic. That's why your dad left. He couldn't even stand the sight of you.”

  The walls seemed to press in close as the pounding of the bass increased. Claustrophobia struck. She’d mentioned the one thing I couldn't handle. The room spun but I wasn't going to give her the satisfaction of crying. Not in front of her. They laughed even harder when they realized I was close to tears.

  I was so lost in my own world of self-deprivation I didn't notice that the bathroom line had thinned down and The Toadies were on stage. They were singing my favorite song so I focused on the lyrics:

  Be my angel...

  Be my angel...

  Do you wanna die?

  I promise you I will treat you well

  My sweet angel...

  I ran.

  Like a coward.

  The sound of laughter from Madison’s horde faded as I tumbled out of the exit doors. The heat from the sun had been seeping into the pavement all day, which left the night air stifling and confining; moving across the blacktop only added to my lightheadedness. By the time I made it to the overflow garage, I was huffing.

  Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry. A strangled sob forced its way out of my throat. It was dark and there were no working lights this far out. I should have sprung for valet. Fishing my phone out of my pocket, a sense of dread hit me; that feeling in the pit of your stomach that threatens to squeeze your insides to slush.

  Glancing around, I looked for signs of movement and suddenly regretted my hasty exit. In case I really did get axe murdered I felt I should text Corinth—at least he would have a time of death confirmation. I couldn't help thinking these macabre thoughts as I reoriented myself and moved in the direction I thought I’d parked. Again, an overwhelming sense of foreboding hit me.

  My Spidey senses were on par tonight because the shape of a man blended into the shadows of the garage entrance. There was an upper level and a lower level and we were both on the lower one. He was within feet of my car.

  His hair was black as night—but that wasn't what stopped me cold. It was the expression on his face that did that.

  I'd never seen a smile look so unnatural.

  When he strode forward, his shadow dipped and elongated making it look like he had wings. I hit the call button and heard a faint click as it went straight to voicemail. Taking my keys from my pocket, I clutched them to my chest, trying to stop my hands from shaking. I'd at least take one of his eyeballs with me if he tried anything. Pretending to be on the phone (people won't attack you while you're on the phone, right?) I said, “Yeah, idiot... I'm in the parking lot waiting for you... um...”

  Trying to open the door with sweaty fingers proved fruitless as the keys slipped out of my grasp and fell to the ground. Struggling to a knee, I realized being overweight was going to be the death
of me, but not quite the death I'd been expecting.

  The tip of his black work boot appeared next to my outstretched hand.

  The keys had been so close.

  He bent down and picked them up, but didn't return them—which sent me into full panic mode. There was nowhere to run and he was in way better shape than I was. I stood slowly and noticed his hair was swept back, held in place with tons of gel. Then there were his eyes: black, hawk-like and cold, — calculated. He studied me too and when he spoke, it was in a thick accent. “You dropped this.” Russian. There was something off about him. At first I couldn't place it, but then it came to me. It was the way he tapped my keys against his leg. Methodical, menacing—it sent a shiver down my spine. He seemed to notice, as if he were taking pleasure in my fear. I dropped my phone into the palm of my hand, took my eyes off him for a brief second to dial 9-1-1, was about to push the call button...

  “You have your father's eyes.”

  My head snapped up but the space he had just occupied was now empty and my keys were on the hood. Impossible. How did he move that fast? I let out a breath I didn't realize I'd been holding and closed my eyes—my father's eyes?

  Chapter 4

  THIS MUST BE WHAT a nervous breakdown feels like. Hallucinations can occur when you're seriously dehydrated. After a few seconds, though, I was finally able to compose myself and get my labored breathing back under control. That’s when I noticed Corinth appear from around the opening to the garage entrance. When he spotted me, he ran the rest of the way to where I stood and bent over, his hands on his knees trying to catch his breath.